In November 2022, I saw a consultant at my local hospital for a chat about my liver, and how it's been affected by my drinking.
I was told that if I did not stop drinking, I would likely be dead within 2 years.
I'm 51, have 2 teenage sons, and have been abusing alcohol for at least 21 years. I'm an intelligent man, I knew that this would be coming, but until someone actually sat me down and laid it out in blunt terms, I thought I was invincible. The good news is that if I stop now, I can lead a happy, healthy life. I show no outward signs of liver disease, my last complete blood tests were OK and my liver is on the borderline of cirrhosis, but not there yet.
The whole meeting terrified me and I was in shock for a few hours, which seems crazy as I knew this would be the outcome. I realised that I had to stop now, no question. I've tried many times before, and had a lot of help, personal and professional. Had I really tried and really listened? Obviously not. So I feel I need a space where I can talk about what is happening, what has happened, and can share my journey with anyone who might want to know more about this horrible condition of alcohol addiction.
I'll journal my current journey. I'll also talk about the professionals who have helped me, the steps I have tried to take and the things that have helped my that are not available to everyone. I'll also talk about when I have felt let down by the health care system, companies I have worked for and professionals who were supposed to be there to help me. I will also try to break some myths about alcohol abuse, and explain some of the steps people have to take when they are stopping drinking.
As I write this it is 3 days and 15 hours since I last had a drink.
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